Dear Diary, friends and family, people who care about me, and people I wish to care for in return,

Let me first blog about the biggest thing that happened this week.

Friday morning. 9am~9.30am. I woke up. YS was coming over for lunch today, she would be coming at around 11am. My maid and grandmother told me quietly, while I laid in bed, that they had prepared lunch and left it in the kitchen. All I had to do was to reboil the soup when I wanted to have lunch. I had chosen and asked my maid to cook noodle soup for I knew YS loved noodles and soup.

I got changed into home clothes, something I haven�t worn in such a long time. Ah, relish this chance to wear home clothes again. Went downstairs and had a relaxing breakfast, which was milo only, for it was quite late in the morning, lunch was one to one and a half hours away. Read my newspapers.

It was around 10 something, close to eleven, YS hadn�t telephoned yet. I took Lucky out, hoping that when YS arrived, she could meet him, for she has seen his picture before and found him cute but never met him in person/dog. I found out that she was still on the MRT, so I took that dog on a long walk, so he was very tired when he reached home.

Soon after I reached home YS had arrived at the bus stop, I ran out to find her and walk her to my home. I gave her Go-go orange. Yummy drink, while I had water, because the long walk and running made me want something that wasn�t sweet like juice. I showed YS around the house. Soon after we had come home, lunch was ready. YS played piano after I demonstrated my lack of talent in piano-playing. Suprisingly, I could sight-read �Yesterday� at a not-so-slow pace. It helped that there were only 3 notes per beat at most and that I was very familiar with the tune.

Lunch was ikan bilis soup, with meat balls, fish cake and either thin yellow noodle or udon. Yan Shan and I had a combination of both noodles. She liked lunch very much, and later told me that she noted the soup had a sweet taste, which is the normal taste of ikan bilis stock, as I told her.

After I hurriedly changed into my attire, Mum dropped the 2 of us off at SAJC after dropping off someone at Toa Payoh.
What did I wear to school? ... ... ... The Wonderful, Stylish, Comfortable, Identity-signifying, SAJC uniform! Hahaha� Why not wear outside clothes? Because this would be the last time I would get to wear the SAJC uniform. I really miss school. YS and many people fretted and worried and agonised over their results, what would they get? Would they fail? Sure, those were valid questions, but all I was thinking of was meeting my jc classmates again. I do miss them, and I was very glad to have been able to see them.

When YS and I were dropped off, Eli was also dropped off. What a nice coincidence, I now didn�t need to telephone Eli. We went to the CC toilet before walking to the canteen to look for our friends. We found EH, XL, JY and MH at the canteen. MT later found me. It helped that she didn�t want me not to wear the SA uniform, so it�s the big sister and little sister, both in SA uniform. How cute.

YS, EH and I went to find CYY, riding on the reason that I had to give CYY an envelope, which I had to since Civil Engineering in Imperial requested for an original testimonial from her. I had to supply the envelope and postage. Haha. The 2 of them made me be the one call her out. I wasn�t scared of doing it. So I intercom CYY, told her that I wanted to ask some questions about the envelope (what address should I write at the back) and that some people wanted to see her. Heehee.

CYY told us that almost everyone in class scored distinctions for Maths, the GP results were good, except that there were people who failed GP (later I found out it was 1 person), and that someone would go onto stage later. EH asked if she passed GP, and the reply was that she might have.

Later hung around at the area near the staircase to the staffroom near popular, directly beside the grass patch outside popular. Mr Yit was at the popular caf� talking to his students. Later we found SM, HR and Elissa outside popular and they joined us. Lynn, came soon, then the bunch of scholars staying in Novena, Shean, SY, Samantha, Ryan, etc. MF also appeared out of nowhere. I don�t know which order they came in. I was just very happy to see them again, though I was being ignored in all this things, so I was in the corner of the group with SW, Elianna and Melody. Lynn was wearing a dress because in PLMGS, where she was teaching, all the female teachers had to wear a skirt or dress, no pants. No wonder the girls from there are so feminine. I recounted how Ms May Chew in primary school �cannot run, must skip!� in my terms. Then there were the sit-upon-s, the little green square mat to keep our skirt clean, but we never used them. Hahaha. Lynn tells me I cannot teach there because I would have a great problem with the dress code. I might... what shoes to wear?

I followed Lynn who went to look for food at the pop caf�. Mr Yit finally stopped me to say Hi and asked why I was wearing the SA uniform. This is the response I gave to everyone including him: a big toothy smile with a 2 finger V-sign. Heehee. Lynn in the end bought half an apple from snack stall cos there were no more sandwiches at pop caf�. Lynn and I then returned to the group.

Mr Yit came over to say Hi to us and told me and those around me he was wondering "who is that student? Looks familiar" when he saw me earlier. Hahaha! He told us that our class had performed very well. I wonder how he knew our results considering that he taught us only Moral Ed, not any of the examinable subjects. Well, he knew and he was very happy for us, like CYY.

Soon it was time to go upstairs to the 2nd storey, where the hall was. We hung around along the corridor where the study tables were. I met Dorcas, Nicolette, Elena, Samatha, Serene and Clara there. Dorcas had come to support her friends. :) how nice.

A short while after, we had to enter the hall. Outside, Lynn, EH, YS and I, the four of us girls who sit at the front row of the classroom together, shook hands and wished all the best and good luck.

As the moment approached, the anxiety built up.

We sat down at the right hand corner on the inner side of the hall away from the main entrance, where the 2 tables, with one marked with an A4 sheet that read 06S03 scotchtaped on, was standing right in the corner, with CYY there.

Most of our class had arrived and were seated. YH rushed in before the new principal spoke, her former principal. JH hadn�t arrived, Vasu was coming late, Jason didn�t appear, Nithya, Nayan and Zac were in India.

She gave her speech (compulsory in Singapore�s tradition). Our batch was the first one to take the new syllabus, and hence the results for our year couldn�t be exactly compared with the previous year�s. So they used our 3H2 and 1H1 to compare with 3A level and 1AO level subjects, and based on that, we had performed better than the previous batch. Our pass rate and distinctions rate were also better than the national average.

Then she showed the top performing H2 then H1 subjects according to percentage of students with distinctions. H2 Physics was third, with 46.1% distinctions. We cheered, just as the arts fac students did with their subjects. Some subjects had more than 50% distinctions. Wah! Brilliant!

Then (or before), she announced the top students in SAJC: Zachary Kok of 06S01 and Esha John of 06S04 (go Esha! Go girls!). Esha was in India, Zachary went up to collect his results, to cheers.

Then the top Arts fac student went up to collect his results. Gwee Yi Jie. As far as I�ve seen and heard, he�s really really smart. He asked the really cheem question at the MFA scholarship tea session.

Then the names of the students who had scored the perfect 80 rank points, meaning all As in all subjects except PW (that is not considered in the calculations), according to class and they went on stage one by one to collect their results. Mun Hon was one of them.

And YS was too! After all that worrying she did fantastically! I and others cheered for her when she went up to collect her results slip.

Lynn and EH and those who were around her were congratulating her. I wanted to but I was too far away to do so, so I let her continue in her revelry. Save my congrats for later.

After all the people went up, then it was time to collect our results. Ooh the dread. Since YH and I were sitting at the back, we were the 2 who would be the last to collect our results for our class.

JH arrived while we were queueing for our results. He had just rushed over in a cab from Pasir Ris after getting out from Tekong because there was no bus. He was wearing his army uniform (no.4 . apparently there are 4 uniforms. I thought there are only 3 or 1: white(I thought only the special people wear that), green and PE.) and brought his dirty heavy black luggage bag full of stuff because he was to pass out of BMT next week. And it was amusing for us girls to see him botak. Hahaha!

He got an earlier position in the queue, which Elissa, SM and HR probably willingly gave to him because they wanted their results later.

Gladys�s parents came to collect her results on her behalf. Gladys is in New York, and if I�m not wrong, she�s going to study in an university there.

Classmates one by one �crossed over� the rows of tables from the receiving to the received and were talking to each other and on the phone, etc. I was still in the queue, and with mutual unspoken �consent� with YH, was to be the last one to collect the results. (How dramatic.)

Slowly, slowly, I got closer and closer to the tables. YS and they all finally remembered about me (she said and realised that she and they all had forgotten about me), then I congratulated her and she wished me all the best and gave me a hug, as well to the other girls.

I began to get worried. I didn�t know what was the benchmark for a good result, and hence didn�t know what to aim for, I didn�t even have any much goal for my results, unlike for my O levels (where I wanted at least 5 distinctions). I really didn�t know what to look forward to, my emotions started to get messy. Ok, just aim for as many As as possible, hope for A in maths, chem, physics, and pass GP and econs, so that I can go university in Singapore (with a pass in GP which is a requirement). Would I get a pass in GP? Would I be the one who failed GP? It wasn�t butterflies in the stomach. It was dread, gloom, harm, hanging around my head.

I saw Gladys results slip. Brilliant! I also had taken peeps at Elissa, YH they all, but I can�t remember what I saw.

Then it was my turn. Sign a form. Then she handed me my things, except for one document which she left on the photocopy machine -_-". (this is when I realised what is she going to post to Imperial.) So I had to collect the sheet of paper from her later after she has done everything at the hall.

So after taking a look at my results slip I rushed to the second highest sitting row behind the counters and prayed to God. All I could utter was,

�Thank You God for my results!�

I had obtained:

General Paper B
Economics C
Mathematics A
Chemistry A
Physics A

YES! I have obtained A for all my H2 subjects! I qualify for Imperial! I passed my GP and Economics! I got a B! Wow!

So I telephoned MT, MP, Mum and Dad immediately to tell them the good news. I was spinning around and walking back and forth and talking quickly (for I wanted to tell more people).

When I finally came down from up there, my friends had gone to talk to the teachers, so I was alone. I sat down at the bottom row, silently. I reassured my friends that I had good results, not bad ones, I wasn�t sad, (I was lonely).

So I jaga-ed Jia Hao�s giant bag as well as YS, EH and Lynn�s brightsparks paper bag which everyone had, while they went around looking for teachers, and I waited for CYY who offered and went to take that sheet of paper.

MF came running looking for CYY, for he had to give her something for admin purposes. I told him CYY was coming back and asked him to sit down. We both chatted for a short while, then he ran off and I agreed to call him when CYY had returned. I was bored of waiting, especially being lonely.

Lynn and I chatted with JH about his NS. I asked him if he had put on muscle. He replied "Of course lah! I can do 8 pull-ups now!" I responded with congratulatory claps. He attained silver for IPPT, which is great. He sure came a long way from last time PE lesson when he could only squeeze out 1 pull-up (and he was better than others who couldn�t even do a pull-up).

CYY came back with my paper and I called MF back. YS, EH, Lynn and JH agreed to some plan of going out after the whole thing. YS had to go for phototaking and interview first.

Spent more time waiting for YS to be done, we agreed to go to Plaza Sing. YH they all went earlier to buy tickets for movie, but I didn�t want to watch for I wanted to see Popo. But I, as well as SY and JY followed for a meal together.

I walked around and around and around and jumped for I was restless. On one of my rounds I found JH to be changed out into going out clothes packing his bag, and I saw his army boots and socks, and from 2 metres away, it was very smelly. I smelt it before I saw it. Eww.

Finally when YS was done, we left for Potong Pasir MRT station. Ah, the memories. It was a group of 4 of us, YS, JY, SY and I travelling together, YH, HR, Elissa and SM were there already, EH had to ask her friend first, Lynn had to go home to prepare for a tuition student, JH didn�t respond to my phone call nor sms.

We found them eating at Kopitiam, they didn�t buy tickets yet. SY, like Lynn, didn�t have lunch yet. YS and I had Yong Tau Foo, and SY had the expected Western Food stall. Haha : D . We don�t change much. I think I changed the least. I�m a constant, except for my age.

Later we saw JH and the SJI boys plus Lynette walk into the foodcourt. JH came over to us and chatted with us, finally he realised it was me who was trying to contact him, for he had a different phone for NS (no handphone camera allowed) and hence didn�t have my number.

So after a good time of eating and chatting I went to see Popo.

I had read my 2 sheets of paper given out to each of us, specifically for each of us. It was our non-academic achievements and personal qualities. The page on the former was very familiar to what I had written for it. However, the other did not resemble what I had written. So the majority of it must have been based on the opinions of CYY and those who had written about me (each of us had to write for 2 people other than ourselves. I wrote for all, albeit some in one-liners.) It was touching to see that I indeed have a special place in the minds of my classmates, and as I quote from what was written for me at the back of my class photograph, �Your efforts do not go unnoticed�. I really treasure the opinions written on that sheet of paper. : )

Later at night when I was at home, I had chicken rice for dinner. I think that was what I had for my O level results that day too. Delicious chicken rice made with our family recipe. A comforting meal. But even then, I felt a void in me. I was lonely, and I was desiring after the word �congratulations�, for me. My mum had praised me at Popo�s house, Gu Zhe had sent me a congratulatory SMS, but what about my friends?

So I went online and found YH, JH, Ai Ping, and Jason, etc. They gave me what I wanted and made me feel happy and wanted. Jason had just returned from Malacca after taking a school up there for a camp, he was a camp instructor. Yong Hui and Ai Ping could potentially be my classmates for we want to do engineering. I also chatted a bit with Nayan and congratulated him on his results, as I did with Jason. YH and I arranged to go for the NTU open house today, which we did. I was very happy to have talked to my friends. Our class, 06S03, had performed very well in the A levels, from the scraps of what I know about the results others had obtained which I shared with Jason, and from what I saw on Lynn�s blog which were some of the reactions the teachers had. Apparently YS saw the ecstasy on Mr Lee�s face when it was announced that H2 Physics was one of the 3 subjects with highest distinction rates. The physics department, as YS, SY, JY and I agree, really did a lot for us with all those extra exams and their efforts really paid off. The teachers really did a lot for us and I thank them for helping our class do well.

These questions now reign in our minds. What next? What do you want to study in university? Where? And ultimately, What do you want to do, what is your dream that you want to fulfil in or as your career? This is the time when we�ve got to be idealistic in examining what we exactly want, and this is what GP teacher says is part of the definition of a youth.

So for me, what is next? What should and do I do?

God, I pray, hold my hand and guide me, show me, tell me what you want me to do, for my life, my destiny is in your hands, and I want to do your will so that this world will be a better place.