today passed by without any happy events.

Pastor ran over time by more than half an hour. i left while he was still talking at 12.30pm. others seeing me leave started to exit the place too.

found mum at the gift shop room after a search through the car parks. they were still packing up.

found popo at the sanctuary. i walked past her when i passed the entrance of the sanctuary. i was looking for her but all the people standing around were blocking.

when i was bringing popo to the chinese service, i saw km going into the canteen. dropped popo off. went back up to the auditorium. suspicious feeling about km in the canteen. went down the stairs that i didn't climb finish, from the top down. KM USED HIS OFFERING MONEY TO EAT CHEE CHONG FUN!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! once again, he never listens to mum. aGAIN! you can see the fustration.

my sms inbox was full so i couldn't receive dad's and mt's SMSes. they ended up calling me. i was being polite to the others around me so i rejected the calls. it was 12.10pm plus.

we were late so mum decided that we not join yeye mama daddy and mt at british club and instead eat at the canteen. i refused to eat. i had no appetite. i was silently fuming away. in the end i had 3 small drumsticks and a big cup of orange juice. mum said the wantan mee was bad. it can be told from the looks.

i didn't agree with the pastor, the much respected pastor. i'm no dissident or whatsoever, but i feel that he took certain verses out of context. out of context really isn't the phrase that it's appropriate. i feel that the story of the magician and baptism of fire of the Holy Spirit would be more appropriate in conveying the point that "once saved, always safe" (somehow seems stolen from sajc's phrase) is not true, that we cannot keep on sinning after we say the sinner's prayer. he used the verses that 'swindlers nor homosexuals nor...' i can't quote because i don't have my bible with me. the quote isn't correct. it basically said "these bad people cannot enter heaven". however, i read the surrounding verses. the verses that immediately came after this was "this is what some of you were. but you were..." cleansed by the blood of Jesus... i can't remember.

actually, the verses pastor quoted were from somewhere in Romans regarding lawsuits between Christians. Romans at that time were judgemental of each other, judging each other and everything. (pastor earlier focussed on some other verses in Romans and explained the background.) Paul was saying that everyone was equal now, after becoming Christians, i think. that verse does not really match what pastor said.

but pastor isn't perfect. apparently, he quoted something, quite a nice quote but i forgot it, and mentioned the wrong source. some church members told him that the quote was not from who he said it was but from some obscure german young pastor so obscure that no one knows the name.

i was reading newspaper before during and after dinner. i read up more on the 7%GST thing, a new way of slicing the pie in the saturday section, after reading about the heartlands and the science section. i liked the science section because it had photos and captions on animals and interviews with Sir David Attenborough and Dr Jane Goodall, people who i support in their conservation efforts. i respect them very much. (personally, i wonder if the people behind greenpeace live green personal lives instead of just protesting and then returning to wasteful lives, something like Sunday Christians.)

as you know, one of the functions of the media is to intepret news for us. unfortuately, for my situation, it did not intepret it. there's a limit to how much one can print on a sheet of paper. so i shall try to think a bit. hopefully someone can give me a good Insight.

The 7%GST means that the lower-income group will benefit. it also means that businesses will benefit since corporate taxes will be cut. does it mean that then my parents' incomes will be increased, if the companies decide to pass on the benefits to their employees. my parents may earn more than others, but they support way more people than others. lets say one person earns $X. he supports his family of 4. my parents earn $1.25X~$1.5X (maybe) but they support more than 5 people each. (count the kois, the dog, the huge amounts of food because of some very big mouths in the family, i shall not continue the list or else i will end up criticising, which is out of point). as a result, the family of 4 can enjoy holidays every year, overseas, possibly having visited the US once. My family here, is stuck in Singapore. the furthest we've been is adelaide. (i have a fear of going to china but that's OOP outofpoint.)

my family does not cook for sunday lunch and goes out to eat. thank God we can afford to do so. Because of the large family size, it costs a lot, especially since most of the time we go to the clubs and eateries. Fong Kee at maxwell is a favourite, sometimes we go japanese at novena sq's ichiban boshi, sometimed british club, occasionally raffles town club..... point being, since 9 pple are in the big bunch, you can imagine the cost, the burden the parents have to pay. and if the GST goes up, without an increase in parents' income, our lifestyle would be compromised.

eating out sunday lunch is a chance for the family to eat together. other days of the week we hardly eat together. i was made a bit upset when we couldn't join daddy and the others, which i assumed which we were going to do (because we're supposed to eat as a family). sorry for the imperfect english.

Now what? As always, the middle-class would always be in a struggle. daddy told me that 2 weeks ago. i agree. We would always struggle. the poor get help, and hopefully have improvements to life, the rich spend money like water, "living" their expanding big bottoms off (i LOATHE the show called The Finer Side on channel 5. want to make us feel poor is it? some of those people are quite cocky. i don't even know who the audience for the show is. i definitely feel it wasn't targetting us, the majority of viewers. been rich from the start. and no matter how "philantropic" they are, the money that they pay to fashion (like buy this $100 thing and $3 would go to charity), most of the money goes to the business.)

ok, no more ranting. i just hope that the burden on my parents won't increase. they're already quite burdened. life is always imperfect~

i did a lot of thinking today.